Roller Blade Movie Review

Are you sitting down for this? In a post-holocaust world where the slogan “skate or die” is taken quite literally, a sexy sect of Amazonian nuns on in-line rollerskates worship a “have a nice day” happy face and battle forces of evil (a masked-wrestler type with a gnomelike puppet pal fixed to his hand) using martial arts, mysticism, communal bathing, and hockey sticks. Cheapjack filmed-on-video mutation must truly be seen to be believed. It's good for a few laughs, but once you realize the no-brainer dialogue and schlock production values aren't going to improve the bizarre novelty turns into an irritant very quickly. Sequellized in Roller Blade Warriors; not surprisingly, filmmaker Donald Jackson also wrought Hell Comes to Frogtown.

1985 88m/C Suzanne Solari, Jeff Hutchinson, Shaun Mitchelle; D: Donald G. Jackson. VHS, Beta NWV