Conan the Barbarian Movie Review

The Hyborean age has never been so brutally portrayed as in writer/director John Milius’ sword and sorcery epic. Thulsa Doom (James Earl Jones) leads a savage raid on young Conan's home village, both killing Conan's father and stealing the sword bequeathed to him. Doom also kills mom in an eerily beautiful, nearly surrealistic, almost tasteful manner (Milius did have access to an elaborate f/x head with eyes-a-rollin’ and tongue-a-flickin’, but didn't ruin the scene by showing it). All this makes Conan plenty angry and he has years to stew about it, first on the wheel of pain (where he becomes Arnold Schwarzenegger) and then as a pit fighter. Luckily, what doesn't kill him makes him strong. Freed by his owner, he teams up with a Mongol (Gerry Lopez) and Valeria, the Queen of Thieves (Sandahl Bergman) and sets forth on a quest to get back his sword, solve “the riddle of steel,” and kill Doom, now the leader of the nasty snake-cult of Set. The action is furious and the swordplay violent and incredible. Each character was given their own “swordmaster” and taught a style that both fit their own body style and personalities – Arnold's is a powerful hack and slash, Sandahl's very graceful and dancerlike. Both can disembowel and behead with the best, and boy do they get to! Milius’ “warrior spirit” comes across both philosophically and graphically. Based on the character created by Robert E. Howard. Sequel: Conan the Destroyer. Rousing score by Basil Poledouris would put some symphonies to shame.

1982 (R) 115m/C Arnold Schwarzenegger, James Earl Jones, Max von Sydow, Sandahl Bergman, Mako, Ben Davidson, Valerie Quennessen, Cassandra Gaviola, Gerry Lopez, William Smith; D: John Milius; W: John Milius, Oliver Stone; M: Basil Poledouris. VHS, Beta, LV MCA